WHY HIRE ME?I build systems that survive production.
"I break things on localhost so your users never cry in production."
[AVAILABLE] OPEN TO REMOTE OPPORTUNITIES
[LOCATION] OPEN TO GLOBAL TEAMS
NEED A VIBE CODER?
I tinker with AI constantly—building autonomous agents, self-hosting open-weight LLMs, and stress-testing failure boundaries. But when something is ridiculously difficult, I turn AI into an obsessive simulator to root out 99.99% of hidden issues.
Self-hosting open-weight models (Qwen 2.5, Ollama) on private Ubuntu VPS servers.
Building automated tool-calling pipelines, stress-testing prompts, and breaking models on purpose.
Stuck on an impossible bug? I turn AI into a simulation engine to predict and neutralize 99.99% of edge-case disasters.
Strict human code verification on concurrency, database locks, idempotency, and security.
- → Generate 2,000 lines of boilerplate in 10 seconds.
- → Write complex regex without checking StackOverflow.
- → Parse obscure documentation and APIs instantly.
- → Scaffold UI components at lightspeed.
- → Take the blame when production crashes at 3 AM.
- → Absorb your frustration. You can't curse at an AI for a broken production or lost sale—it won't understand. A human does.
- → Push back on bad product requirements.
- → Understand actual business logic and user pain.
- → Give a damn about the company's survival.
AI can do it all, but when the server is down or a sale drops, AI cannot give you sympathy. It has zero emotion... as fun as it is to tinker with.
DON'T HAVE TIME? HERE'S THE 30-SECOND VERSION.
I’m a PHP / Laravel Engineer with 5+ years of production experience building high-reliability backend systems, multi-gateway payments, e-commerce architectures, and high-volume analytics pipelines. I specialize in taking ownership of messy, mission-critical problems and turning them into stable, performant software.
02 // I DON'T JUST LIST TECHNOLOGIES.
HERE'S WHAT I'VE ACTUALLY BUILT IN PRODUCTION.
THE BUNDLE PRODUCT PROBLEM
The platform required dynamic multi-item product bundles with complex pricing tiers, stock decrement across child items, cart state persistence, and webhook checkout safety.
GIVE ME A PROBLEM.
These are the kinds of problems I enjoy solving in production.
SERVER ARCHITECTURE & DEVOPS
I don't just write application code—I run a production bare-metal server powering real applications, zero-trust networks, and autonomous AI infrastructure.
FrankenPHP & Laravel (Worker Mode)
Keeps Laravel boot in memory with worker mode, slashing response latency down to sub-10ms for production apps.
Cloudflare Tunnels (cloudflared)
Outbound-only encrypted tunnels route global traffic directly to Docker without port forwarding or exposed server IPs.
Tailscale Mesh VPN (WireGuard)
Enables direct, secure SSH and management access from any device across firewalls and CGNAT with zero public exposure.
Hermes Sysadmin Agent (Telegram)
Custom AI agent orchestrating shell commands, diagnosing 502/1033 errors, and managing cron jobs directly from my phone.
MySQL 8.0 & Redis 7 Caching
Tuned InnoDB buffer pools and sub-millisecond in-memory caching for extreme multi-tenant app load resilience.
Running a Production-Grade Homelab on Bare Metal
Read the full breakdown on routing, Cloudflare tunnels, error recovery (502 & 1033), and zero-cost AI agents.
THINGS I BUILD WHEN NOBODY ASKED ME TO.
From generative code experiments and retro UIs to local LLM agents and pipeline toys—I tinker constantly. Building, hacking, and breaking systems on purpose to truly master how they work under the hood.
8Bit OS
A retro-style 8-bit operating system interface running entirely in the browser.
ASCII Shooter
A terminal-style ASCII-based shooter game built for the web.
Generative Math Art
Mathematical / generative art experiments driven by code.
lol-dir
A playful, experimental directory indexer.
HAVE A HARD PROBLEM?
I LIKE THOSE.
Whether you need a senior engineer for a high-volume Laravel project, a payment/webhook integration, or database optimization, let's connect.
If you need a vibe coder with logic understanding, hit me up.